What happens during a Peer Mediation?

To make a mediation necessary, there must first be a conflict. But what comes next?

Here are some of the basic steps in Peer Mediation followed by a brief explanation of each step. It should be noted that while Peer Mediation seems to be very linear on paper, in practice it is very fluid. Mediations do not just proceed step-by-step!

Intake

In this step of the process the mediation advisor will gather some background information about the conflict. This allows the advisor to choose mediators who will seem balanced and impartial to the disputants. The advisor will also give the mediating team some background about the conflict and students involved.

Peer mediations take place in neutral areas. A counselor's office or a meeting room may be used. Generally there is a table set up with chairs and paper. Depending on the nature of the conflict the disputing students may be sitting next to each other or separated by mediators.

Introductions

At this stage the peer mediators introduce themselves and ask the disputing parties for names. This is a welcoming step that should put everyone at ease. At this point the mediators will also introduce the advisor.

What to expect, Ground Rules and Agreements

The mediators now go over exactly what steps will be followed so that everyone is clear on what mediation is, and what mediators do and do not do. Peer mediators will emphasize that they are impartial and do not solve problems. The mediators then go over the ground rules, especially confidentiality, and ask if there are any special rules to be added. The students in conflict are asked to agree to the ground rules verbally. Finally, everyone is reminded that the mediation is voluntary. Anyone can leave at any time. The mediators ask the disputants if they wish to continue.

Storytelling

This is where each party is asked for his or her version of what has happened. The mediators ask open-ended questions in order to gather as much information as possible. Peer mediators are trained in paraphrasing to help ensure that facts are straight and that each disputant feels that someone has listened carefully.

Issues

Peer mediators are trained to search for the major issues behind a disagreement. Mediators search for "big picture" issues such as trust, friendship and respect during the storytelling phase. In this part of the mediation the issue, or issues, are brought out to help the disputants to see the bigger picture and find the solution that resolves the entire problem. Sometimes, being able to understand the issues behind a conflict goes a long way toward resolving the problem. Some mediation programs require a mandatory time-out after storytelling to help identify the underlying issues.

Brainstorming Solutions

In this phase the disputants brainstorm a list of possible solutions. From this list, mediators help the parties to refine their options and create the solution. The mediators use open-ended questions to make sure the issues brought up will be completely resolved.

Agreement

During this phase the disputants reach an agreement. Usually the agreement is put into words and written down for the disputants to sign. In some cases a verbal agreement is all that is needed . The mediators write the wording exactly as the parties wish and make sure there is information put into the agreement about what to do if the agreement is not working out. The agreement phase usually ends with some congratulations about reaching a solution.

Follow-up

The final step to the mediation process is following up. This is a quick, confidential check-in with the disputants to be sure everything is going as agreed. This may happen a day after, a week after, or longer depending on what seems necessary. The follow-up is a quick way to remind parties of the agreement and to keep praising the success.
A note about the advisor: You might have noticed that the advisor seems to be a silent partner in this process after the intake step. That is exactly the case. Early on, or when mediators are younger, advisors may play a more active role in coaching or even taking over a difficult mediation. Advisors can be helpful during a time-out to discuss what is happening or help younger mediators to find the underlying issues and needs. As mediators get older and more experienced, advisors are there as observers.

Next - What to tell parents. OR Ways teachers can use mediation for their own conflicts.

Aaron Sterling has helped develop peer mediation and conflict resolution programs in California and Virginia.
He currently teaches elementary students in northern Virginia.

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